Ali

My friend Ali is battling cyctic fibrosis. She's dying. She wrote this poem to her disease. I wanted to post it here so others could appreciate her talent and because where she posted it, it'd be deleted in 10 days. I wanted a record of her talent.

Cystic Fibrosis

Sometimes I feel hurt,
Not knowing what I did so wrong.
I never hurt any one,
Why must I be the one hurting.

CF what did I do to you,
Other then hate you for killing me,
How does it feel to know
I am never going see another Christmas

The pain inflicted on me,
 I can no longer bar.
Coughs feel like sand paper on wood
 With every breath my lungs throb from rips and tars.

Why cant u just stop all my hurting
You wont get me . I don't go with out a fight
i will fight! fight with all my might
You can try, but so can i.

CF you  can stand there, being all big and bad
But just remember I will stand against you  
And  standing beside me, all that care about me
So u want me, then take me but it wont be easy

 One day someone is going to stop you
And I'll be the first one to great you at god door
"U want in heaven?
Sorry go to hell"

~alison b~

Freshman year

From Bilbo to
Rat poison
Everyday in
School, the only reason we
Had to get up in the
Morning was often the
Amazing friends we made and
Nicknames we'd been given.

Yelling sex and other
Events of great amusement,
All year long, we had great frun.
Russo, Sayid, Jack, and Sawyer live to see another year.


Just a quick poem to sum up freshman year with my wonderful friends. :-) And two about dear friends themselves.

Joking around, picking on me,
Always with an air of love,
Cathartic though our lives may be,
Kim is always there for me.


Squishing straw wrappers
And spinning spare change
Years may come and go but
I know my
Dear Sara will always be there.


And two more I wrote.

Please don't mislead me, mylord.
Really, I couldn't handle it.
If one more beau breaks my heart
Never could I love again. As
Crimson tears spill on a crimson dress,
Everyone passes by, never knowing as I
Slowly, painfully lull myself to sleep and
Still I know tomorrow will be a new day.


Because of one word
Or one glance, my hopes and feelings
Unify to leave me
Never sitting still.
Crashing will happen later.
You never know what makes me bouncy.


And that is it for poetry tonight.

Smiles that won't fade

Smiles that won't fade
Laughs that never die
Dreams that stay forever
These are the things I wish for

These things may never come to be
But who can stop me dreaming?
No one controls my thoughts
No one controls my hopes

Smiles that last for days
Laughs that stick in my memory
Pictures prove that we were happy
Even when the days are long gone

Seasons may change
Winter to spring
But friends remain true
Long after the snow falls



Yes I stole the first two lines of the last stanza from Come What May from Moulin Rouge.

In memory of Charlie

Out they looked
Through the glass
At the day
Now in their past
Remembering the joys
And sorrows
Of all the time
Against which he borrows

Time is fleeting
Running past
Never guaranteed
To ever last
We may have an hour
Or we may have a year
When our time is over,
who will shed a tear?

Each day we must
Live to the fullest
We must enjoy each day
As if it were the greatest
We must live for those
Who came before us
Don't waste time
And please don't fuss

Live for Charlie.
Live for those he left behind.
Live the way he'd want you to.
Don't leave the world maligned.
Smile each day.
Don't ever forget.
Each day remember with a smile
He's not gone, not yet.



Charlie Cote-Gone but never forgotten

Diamante #1

Heartbreak

Difficult, Lost

Crying, Dying, Faking

Heart, Pain, Truth, Desire

Hoping, praying, wishing

Deep, romantic

True Love

In for a world of trouble?

Warily, she talks
To the boy that broke her heart.
Cautiously, she asks
Him to the same game.
The game he came to last year
Where he tossed her heart aside.
Happilky, she catches up
With a dear old friend.
Smiling, she writes and realizes
she's opening her heart
to a world of hurt
a world of pain and suffering.
But she knows
if she doesn't
she could never be happy
never find love.
She only wants his friendship.
She doesn't want his love.
She's single and she's happy
but he's gonna be that guy.
The one she always says she's over
but who she always goes back to.
She doesn't like that but she can't change it.
It's not up to her.
And it's not up to him.
It's out of their hands...

Biopoem

Victoria
Intuitive, compassionate, loving, and inexperienced
Daughter of two ppl that just can't get along
Who is struggling through life at times, always caught in the middle of something, and relying on her faith and her friends to get through
Lover of words, Coke, and fuzz
Who fears bugs, the dark, and dying alone
Who needs a good night's sleep in her own bed, to regulate her sleep patterns, and Coke for my newest addiction (caffeine)
Who gives advice on things she's never dealt with before, a shoulder to cry on, and kisses to Samantha on every occasion
Who would like to wean herself off caffeine, a nice hot shower, and a cure for cancer
Resident of a land where unicorns roam wild and the horrors of Pandora's box were never unleashed
Victoria

Why don't you try your hand at one? Instructions are at Poetry Dance.

I'm back!

Kay, y'all I'm baaaaaaaaaaack! Love ya! I'm going to turn all alerts back on as soon as I save this. So.... what did I miss in *your* life?

I miss you!

Good-bye

Kay, y'all. I'm gonna be gone for a week with Lindz. I'm going to Alpine Lake camping. For some reason I'm not excited about it at all. We leave tomorrow morning but I'm going there tonight. (She gets back from WI tonight.) I better go get my ass in gear and pack up. We come back next Sunday (the 28th, I think). Until then, I love you all and I'll miss you!

Vickey

not my work but relevant

True Story. A religion teacher assigned her class an essay on what makes a good Christian. One student wrote about praying nightly, say no to abortion, banning gay marriage, and donating money. The other student wrote about talking to God and allowing people to enjoy their lives, and supporting gay marriage. The day the teacher was to hand the papers back, she called up the second student and told him she would pray for him when he went to hell. The student asked why would he be going to hell, and why he got an F on his paper. The teacher told him that Catholisim is against gay marriage. The student looked at her for a minute, then said aloud, "I'm gay." The teacher kicked him out of class as if he had said fuck or worshiped Satan. A girl in the back of class who had a boyfriend and was obviously straight got up and left too.

If you would leave the classroom, repost this. It doesn't matter if you're straight, bi, or gay. It doesn't matter if you're Catholic or not. Everyone is a human being and deserves happiness.

Fingers rushing to get it out
Brain pumping fast
Inspiration pouring out

Poems
Songs
Works of art

I spend days
Writing out my
Simple inspiration

A play
book or
lullaby

I paint
I write
I sing

I do anything
I am inspired
I create beauty

Ode to my allergies

5/27

Allegra
Claritin
Benedryl
Tylenol allergy
Why can't someone just fix me?

Sneezing
Sniffling
Watery eyes
RUnny nose
What the hell is up today?

Miserable
Sickly
Congrested
No relief from medicine
When will this pass?

Tissues in my purse
Water in y eyes
Pajamas in school
Fog in my brain
Why can't I be normal?

Dreaming a dream
Full of ecstasy
Smelling his smell
Full of his love
Wanting his body
Close in proximity
Needing him in
The immediate vicinity

Sweet summer nights
Cold winter days
Holding him close
Feeling his heart ace
Under his skin
Making it faster
With my every move
Soaring with him
Far and above

Dying each second
we are apart
Living each moment
I'm in his arms

What if you walked in
Right now?
What if you saw me like this?
With my dirty hair and my glasses on?
In just my sweatshirt and jeans?
With no make-up on?
What if you saw me sick?
Sneezing and coughing with a runny nose?
Would you turn away in disgust?

What if you saw me like this?
What if you walked away 'cause I'm
So different from who I was before
I'm not the girl I used to bed
No the girl you made love to on those cold winter nights and those rainy summer days

I don't paint my nails anymore.
I don't wear a size two.
I'm just a single woman looking
For a good night not a commitment
Still got my standards and my morals
You see I'm still just myself
I might not look the same as I did back then but I still wonder and I still worry

What if you saw me like this?
What if you walk away 'cause I'm
So different from who I was before
I'm not the girl I used to be
Not the girl you made love to on those cold winter nights and those rainy summer afternoons.

When I'm in my more thoughtful moods
I wonder who we would have been
I wonder if you still think about those rainy summer days
Do you still love me like I love you?
Or am I just a memory...

What if you saw me like this?
What if you stay by me?
Would it turn out the same?
Or would we work this time?
Do you want to find out
Starting right now
Then come home to me...

Inspiration: Anna Dagmar and the song "Breakfast at Tiffany's"

"Party poems"

Vampires
Witches
Warlocks
Banshees

Pound
Pound
Pound
Pound

Connected
Repaired
Together
Whole

Torn
Apart
Forever
Alone

Even
In
A
Crowd

Alone
On
My
Bed

Forever
Alone
Forever
Apart

Confusion
Reigns
With-in
My heart

Confusion
Forever
Leave me
Alone

Curled up in a ball
Wanting some peace
Leave me alone
Get your arm off of me

 

6/23

Forever
This love is
Forever
Like a brother
Forever
Protector
Forever
Savior
Forever
Hero
Forever
Love
Forever

6/23

Sitting alone on a step
He came over
Just to talk.
When the cause
Of my troubles
Walked over,
Around my shoulder or
On my knee, his arm went.
*Perfect* reaction.
Forever grateful.
I love him.
Forever and a day.
My brother,
My friend,
Amazing.

Sometimes

7/2

Sometimes I feel inadequate.
Sometimes I am shallow.
Sometimes I don't measure up.
Sometimes I am weak.

Sometimes I feel thoughtful.
Sometimes I am empowered.
Sometimes I don't worry my day away.
Sometimes I am strong.

Sometimes doesn't cut it.
Sometimes is too much.
Sometimes just won't work.
Sometimes isn't good.

Sometimes must change.
Sometimes is not enough.
Sometimes must increase.
Sometimes is not okay.

Sometimes I can't speak.
Sometimes I can't move.
Sometimes I can't think.
     All because of you.

Inspired by Bryan

June 15, 2005

Torn

Confusion
Torn in two die-rections
Doubting
God, do I hate doubting

Assurance
Knowing exactly
Clarity
God, do I miss clarity

Tears of frustration
Tears of aggravation
Tears of sorrow and
Tears of pain

Wanting hope
Wanting help
Knowing it can’t come
From anyone but me

I better figure it out
I better do it soon
I better know
Just what to do

Somebody…
     Help?

Bella-Part One

Writing was the only thing she could admit her talent for. She couldn't fill out a C cup and couldn't run an eight-minute mile but she could write. All her life, Isabella's teachers had commended her writing skills. From short stories and essays to plays and mock-television scripts for her favorite television shows, Isabella loved to write and did so at every opprotunity. At the age of fifteen, Bella, as her friends called her, began an open journal online. Pouring her heart and soul out through her fingertips, she bared her soul for complete strangers. Neither of her parents quite understood her and nor did her friends. They meant well but all attempts to cheer her up ended with a fake smile and artifical laughter on her part. Yet, most friends were fooled with the illegitimacy of her act.

Bella's life wasn't the greatest but it wasn't the worst. She had two parents who loved her, even if they didn't always seem like they did, a few very close friends, an emmense talent for writing, and all those little luxuries most Americans take for granted. Yet, she couldn't shake the feelings of worthlessness, depression, and aggravation that snuck up on her like a thief in the night. The littlest things could set her off: from a wrong look to a day of grounding, even if she deserved far more than that. Subsequently, her day of punishment would be lengthened to a week or more.

Welcome!

Congratulations on stumbling across my journal. I'll be writing bits and pieces of stories, poems, and other such notions that amuse me and were, unless otherwise noted, written by me. I'll also post some pictures that serve no purpose other than to capture natural beauty or to fulfill a creative urge. I recommend you not start in the middle of any stories. Follow the links in the "Other Journals" section to the beginning of the stories and to browse poems and pictures through the links I've provided.

Vickey